The Silly Alchemist

 “Where are you going? I haven’t eaten- sit and keep me company!” Princess Longji grabbed the child’s collar with a swoop, then lifted him on to her lap.

“Let me go! You eat your noodles, I want to go play. I haven’t got many days left to enjoy myself here!” The child struggled, wanting to leave her ‘magic grasp’.

He didn’t know how many people envied him right now. To be hugged by Princess Longji, to sit in her lap…

“So you know it too? Then why not keep me company for a little while longer. We don’t know when we’ll meet again!” she said wistfully.

The child looked at her, thought for a moment, then said, “Alright, I’ll keep you company for the last few days…”

“Hey hey! What do you mean ‘the last few days’!! You sound like we won’t meet each other forever. You’re so silly, you can’t say that!!” huffed Princess Longji, who tightened her hug.

“Princess Longji, your noodles…” The owner appeared, bringing a bowl of noodles filled with different ingredients. His eyes filled with admiration as he looked at the child.

However, when the child saw the bowl of noodles, his face changed. Upset, he complained, “That’s not fair, why does she get so much stuff in her bowl! My noodles were so little. Are you favouring my cousin because she’s a pretty girl!!”

“…” The owner stood awkwardly, not sure what to say. As if the child had said exactly what he thought.

“You little troublemaker, who can blame your cousin for being so pretty? Of course he would give me extra food. You can be jealous all you want, I’ll only share a little with you… Ah, you little troublemaker, I haven’t finished speaking and you’re eating already!!” Princess Longji realised the child had already started to attack her noodles gleefully.

“Even if you didn’t say that, I’d still eat some!” came his reply as he continued to eat.

“…” She didn’t say anything. Instead, she proceeded to fight the child for her food.

This scene made the stall owner sweat. He really wanted to say that he still had noodles. If they wanted, he could always cook more.

Then again, he didn’t understand that they would still fight even if there were more noodles! The problem didn’t lie with the portion of noodles!!

Although the stall owner didn’t know what was going on, watching them made him understand something. He threw all the rumours he’d heard out of the window.

What did they mean, illegitimate son? That’s bullshit, they were insulting my goddess!!

“Brother, according to your estimates, how long before recovering your original state?” said Princess Longji after finishing her noodles. She hugged the child gently.

“Not more than three days. The larger the size, the faster the recovery would be!” said the child.

Recovering? Original state? The stall owner, still straining his ears, was confused. He didn’t understand what Princess Longji was talking about. Was this state not the child’s ‘original state’?

That’s right! He wasn’t supposed to look like this, he was a youth of 18-19 years old!!

As our story reaches this point, you’d know that the child is Ye Lang!!

Ye Lang was now the height of a child, plus with his teenage face, many people mistook him for a child. That was how he became the rumoured illegitimate son of Princess Longji!

This wasn’t something Ye Lang expected either. He thought recovery would be sudden, where he’d immediately return to his original size. Instead, the results were this. He was recovering gradually.

According to his calculations, as his body grew, the effects of the herb would decrease, that’d mean his growth rate would get faster and faster!!

He could also work out that his body would return in three days. He was very happy because that meant being able to escape Princess Longji.

These days, she’d been bringing Ye Lang with her all day. Especially when he was still tiny, she almost always kept him in her belt.

According to her, she liked Ye Lang this tiny, because it was convenient…

And because Ye Lang was tiny, she’d bully him a little. Too bad he was so small!!

That was how Ye Lang lived in suffering, constantly wanting to recover quicker to escape her!

Of course, he didn’t let her off easy either. When he did research on methods of recovery, he’d accidentally put a little herb into her food, or accidentally spill it on her.

That caused Princess Longji to faint at least once a day, then she’d be treated by Ye Lang…

“You little troublemaker! You did that on purpose!!” She clenched her teeth, accusing Ye Lang of doing all of it on purpose. Ye Lang always insisted they were accidents though, and she had no evidence of him doing it on purpose, so…

Of course she wouldn’t back down! She continued to bully Ye Lang! An eye for an eye, I’ll kill you!!

That was how both of them were trapped in a cycle…

Also, after Ye Lang recovered, Coldblood Five wanted to escape. She was caught by Ye Lang and brutally bullied!

What she was worried about before finally came true. She was held in his hand, like a kid holding a toy!

The worst thing was that this kid didn’t seem to like his toy. He kept tugging on his toy, pulling, tossing it around…

This was payback!! Revenge served cold!!

It was still fine though. Most of the time, Ye Lang would forget and instead bring Coldblood Five around to play!

After Ye Lang recovered, perhaps it would be the moment they both would separate. He might not want to bring Coldblood Five along with him, and Coldblood Five wouldn’t want to follow him either. She had other things going on!!

During this period, even the empress dowager would often chat with Ye Lang, even hugging him!

In her own words, she said she thought she’d missed the opportunity to watch her grandson grow up. This was an opportunity given by the heavens for her to make amends during this time, so she could watch her grandson grow little by little every day.

Two days later, in the morning, Ye Lang had already almost fully recovered. There was still a centimetre or two left, but within an hour he’d get back that centimetre!

“Alright, I’m leaving. Don’t miss me too much. If you want to see me, go to Sheng City!” he said to Princess Longji, Coldblood Five and Coldblood Seven standing in front of him. He was stretching.

“No one will miss you! I can’t wait for you to leave!!” said Coldblood Five suddenly. She was sitting on Ye Lang’s shoulder. Her tiny head was cocked, looking nonchalant.

“Little Five, I’m considering bringing you along with me. Just in case you don’t recover, I’ll be able to help you!” said Ye Lang solemnly, deep in thought.

“…”