Chapter 264 - Zhuang Nainai, What Am I to Do with You?
Upon reviewing his health examination report, Zhuang Nainai had heaved a sigh of relief.
Then, Si Zhengting had reached his hand out to her. “Where’s your health examination report?”
Zhuang Nainai had raised her head.
Si Zhengting still remembered to this day that her hair was pulled back in a ponytail. She had proudly tapped him under his chin and said in a radiant, enchanting tone, “My mother has brought me up so well! What could be wrong with me? Let me tell you, my mother tells me that I’m as strong as a bull!”
She bellowed like a bull after she had finished speaking.
How could such a healthy person like Zhuang Nainai now… be overworked to the point of falling so ill?
Thinking back to how he had carried her in his arms and dashed madly for the hospital, he recalled that she had weighed so little…
Si Zhengting suddenly clenched his fists. Just how much had she suffered in the past five years for her to be overworked to this extent?
He was unaware of when the doctor had left the ward. They were the only two people in the ward now, and it was so quiet that he could hear her breathing clearly.
Si Zhengting stood up. He walked to Zhuang Nainai’s side, one step at a time.
He gazed at her wrists. They were so slender that he could sever them with a twist of his hands.
After they had reunited, she had seemed to laugh without a care in the world, which had left him feeling very uneasy.
He felt as though the breakup, which had happened five years ago, had no adverse effects on her. Instead, he was the only party who was stuck in the past, unable to break free of its lingering effects.
Back then, he had thought that it was only fair if both of them suffered from the lingering effects.
But every single time he found out that she was not doing well, he didn’t feel as relieved as he thought he would be. Instead, he felt even more bothered and uneasy about it.
What was it about her that made him like this?
Si Zhengting slowly squatted by the side of her bed.
His expression was unusually serious. He did not bother hiding the affection and the anger arising from his love for her – they were apparent in the gaze directed at her. He was confused by the numerous emotions intermingling within him, causing him to lose focus.
He reached out and pulled the blanket over her body. Then he caressed her cheeks.
He caressed her gently, as though she was a precious, unparalleled treasure. The gentleness he displayed was full of bitterness and helplessness, which would be undetectable by an observer.
Yes, he felt helpless.
He did not know how to face her.
Did he love her? Whenever he thought about how she had abandoned him five years ago, whenever he thought back to how he had been alone all these years, whenever he thought about the hurt she had caused, he felt a little resentful.
Did he hate her? She had obviously let him down, but seeing how she was so weak, and listening to the hardships that she had been through in the past five years, he could not bring himself to hate her.
He had been cold and indifferent his entire life. All the intense emotions such as love and hate he had experienced were directed toward her.
But now…
The hand that was caressing her suddenly clenched into a fist.
He fixed his cold gaze on her for a moment. Then, his fist slowly loosened and he held her hand tightly. It was as though he was going to hold it forever.
He lowered his head, his gaze vacant. He lowered his tone and spoke in an aggrieved manner, “Zhuang Nainai, what am I to do with you?”
—
Ji Chen stood outside the ward. He saw Si Zhengting kneeling by Zhuang Nainai’s bedside through the glass window. Si Zhengting’s head was buried in the palm of his wife’s hand. Seeing Si Zhengting experiencing so much pain and being so helpless, Ji Chen felt inevitably worried about the former.
He lowered his head and looked at the past five years’ worth of information about Madam. After thinking about the hardships that Madam had been through, he sighed, raised his hand, and knocked on the door of the hospital ward.