Chapter 291
Chapter 291 A Deal in the Night
The Outer Circle. Byron Clan’s outpost.
Snorlax the Goblin passionately worked away at something in a small room away from the banquet.
A basic magical machine had put up a white screen in front of him. Duke Gazlowe, the one who hailed himself as the greatest inventor, engineer, and trans-planar merchant of the Goblin Empire, appeared on the screen. He wore a thick monocle lens and sprayed saliva all over the display as he shouted at Snorlax.
“No! Never… ” Gazlowe waved his thick and hairy green arms about, “We won’t talk unless the price is lower than seventeen magic crystals… I’ll never let a vampire like you take advantage of me again. Not to mention, you haven’t gotten me anything of value despite us knowing us each other for such a long time. You… You are not qualified to be a trans-planar merchant. The best you can hope for is to be a shitty goblin that goes around picking up trash… “
The opponent’s insults had clearly provoked Snorlax as well. Anyone who attacked his dream of being a trans-planar merchant was inviting his utmost anger.
“You freaking coward that can do nothing but hide behind that screen of yours. This Transportation Tool you gave me is a shitty second-rate product and you have the guts to scold me? It can’t transport anything more than five hundred grams worth of stuff, and an error happens every three or four transportations. Who knows which corner of the universe your shitty machine has sent all my treasures to? Am I supposed to be the one to bear the losses incurred by your machine?”
“Bastard. You uncultured swine of a goblin. You don’t even understand what a terrifying amount of energy is required to pierce through plane barriers and send items across. You have no energy furnace, no reactor, and no energy source. You are a filthy excuse of a goblin with absolutely nothing. Do you want a large and stable passage with a few low-quality energy crystals? Not even the adept you are serving would have technology like that, much less the Goblin Empire!”
“……”
Gazlowe seemed to have understood something important after a long period of silence. A fawning smile appeared on his green and oily face once more.
“My beloved Snorlax, I present to you the greatest war machine in the Goblin Empire- the Magic Mecha. You will no longer need to fear your enemies with this thing. It will become your greatest and most loyal soldier, obliterating every enemy in its sights! “
“Oh? Are you talking about those terrifying metallic things the size of a hill? I don’t intend to start a construction company any time soon. What am I going to use this thing modified from your tree-cutting Goblin Shredders for? Just the metals and spare parts I would need to gather to construct it would take up a hundred years of my time. How is this thing useful to me?” Snorlax’s intelligence had clearly gone through the roof today. He shouted angrily at the screen, no longer the naive and foolish goblin he used to be.
“Don’t get angry, my beloved Snorlax. I’ll introduce you to another ultra-scary weapon- the Magic Cannon. With this cannon, you can become undefeatable. No enemy would be able to defend a single blast from it!”
“Nope. Nope… I’m a pacifist goblin merchant. You can sell those violent weapons to some other guy! I only need high-grade elementium cores. These are things my master has ordered me to gather. The more the better… “
“Very well. Very well. Elementium cores it shall be. At what price do you intend to sell the heart for?”
“The blueprints for that Magic Mecha and a completed Magic Cannon, along with a hundred elementium cores above Second Grade!”
“Bullshit!” Gazlowe leaped three feet into the sky, “Why don’t you just go and rob someone at that price? Your mechanical heart isn’t even worth this much!”
“Then how much can you give in return?”
Gazlowe extended three fingers, but then hesitated for a moment, gritted his teeth and extended a fourth finger.
“Four Second Grade elementium cores. That’s all you can get!”
“Liar… ” Now, it was Snorlax’s turn to jump three feet into the sky, “This is daylight robbery… this is bankrupting my entire establishment. You are the greediest, most shameless, and stingiest goblin I have ever met. This price is complete highway robbery!”
The two goblins clearly had an unbelievable amount of stinginess and perversion carved into their very bones. Yet, at the same time, both of them were so greedy and shameless. The two goblins continued to point at each other, flinging every single insult they knew across the brilliant screen of light. After a few bouts of exchanged insults, the two would get together and start a round of actual negotiations.
And just like that, a bizarre interplanar trade was completed in the dead of night!