Chapter 466 - She Will Not Be Forgiven Anymore
It took her five minutes from the office in the police department to the parking lot outside.
In those five minutes, Xu Youning clearly sorted out the whole story.
She realized that both Kang Ruicheng and Mu Sijue had their own plans. The two had deceived her and taken advantage of her to the extreme.
She, who thought that she had deceived the world, was the most stupid one.
In the last minute, Xu Youning made a decision that would influence the rest of her life.
The police officer who escorted Xu Youning out looked at her sympathetically and said, “Miss Xu, the departed should be laid to rest. Go to the funeral house and prepare for your grandma’s funeral as soon as possible.”
“Officer Chen, please excuse me for having offended you just now,” Xu Youning bowed to the police officer and said, “And I want to thank you for handling my grandma’s case. Thank you for your hard work.”
Officer Chen sighed and said, “I heard that your grandma was your only family member. I know how you feel. You have my condolences.”
Xu Youning nodded gratefully and got in her car to leave.
Officer Chen watched her drive away, confused, while feeling sympathy for her.
She looked extremely glacial while she threatened him, asking for the evidence as well as the autopsy report; just as if she could kill anyone at any time. The officer thought, “Why did she suddenly calm down after crushing the vial?”
In addition, when he told her that the police had found out the truth, she, who claimed to look for the truth, was not interested in what he said at all.
From her words, it seemed that she was the only one who could find out the truth.
The officer wondered, “Could it be that what we’ve found out isn’t the truth?”
…
Half an hour later, Xu Youning stopped her car in front of the funeral house.
There seemed to be inherent sadness in that place.
Xu Youning felt as if she had been filled with lead. She walked into the funeral house with heavy steps. Under the guidance of the staff, she saw her grandmother in a dim room.
Her grandmother was lying on a cold operating table with her eyes closed, looking as if she were sleeping soundly.
“Yes”—Xu Youning couldn’t help thinking—”Grandma is asleep!”
With tears hovering in her eyes, she frantically rushed over. She placed her hands on her grandmother’s body only to find that it had become stiff, and her grandmother’s heart had stopped beating.
Xu Youning seemed to have been woken up from her dream, rooted to the spot.
She thought, “My grandma has no body heat. She has left this world. She won’t wake up anymore.”
“Grandma…”
Xu Youning whimpered desperately and burst into tears.
“This wasn’t part of the plan. It shouldn’t be like this.”
According to her plan, as soon as she returned from the island, she would whisk her grandmother off and arrange everything for her, after which she would find a way to get far from Mu Sijue’s reach.
In her eyes, as long as she left City G, Mu Sijue’s territory, even if he wanted to kill her, he wouldn’t easily succeed because she was able and Kang Ruicheng would protect her.
As long as she stayed vigilant, she would be able to watch over her grandmother in her old age until her final days.
Xu Youning still remembered that when she began to work for Kang Ruicheng, she had been sent to a deserted island for training.
During the most painful part of the training, they had drilled for three days and two nights without rest. All they ate were edible wild herbs and worms, taking them to their physiological and mental limits.
That time, most of them chose to quit.
However, she persisted till the end, thanks to her goal of becoming stronger to protect her grandmother in the future.
Afterward, when she was assigned to perform her missions, she had nearly died several times. If it wasn’t for the image of her grandmother waiting for her at home, she wouldn’t have clenched her teeth to persist to the last moment, nor would she have managed to escape from the jaws of death.
After reopening her parents’ case, she had been trying her best to live for her grandmother.
However, her efforts had all been in vain in the end.
Her grandmother died because of her.
Xu Youning bent down and buried her face in her grandmother’s chest, like how she did when she was a child. Her tears dripped on her grandmother’s body, but they failed to warm it.
She looked like a zombie, as if her soul had been taken away. She held her grandmother in despair and repeatedly whispered, “Grandma, I’m sorry…”
When she was a child, every time she apologized after making a mistake, her grandmother would pat her head and helplessly forgive her with pity.
That time, however, her grandmother would never be able to forgive her anymore.
Her grandmother would never pat her head, saying “oh, my little girl,” nor would she cook delicious food for her, nor would she look at her fondly.
For the rest of her life, she would always feel like an ashamed sinner.
“Youning.” Auntie Sun went in the room and helped Xu Youning up, then she said, “The departed should be laid to rest. Let’s set about your grandma’s funeral.”
Xu Youning thought, “The funeral? It means that… I will never be able to see my grandma, right?”
Xu Youning looked at Auntie Sun with runny eyes, shaking her head helplessly. She said, “Auntie Sun, please don’t. Just give me one more day. I want to stay with my grandma, please…”
“Youning, come on,” Auntie Sun held Xu Youning’s hand tightly and said, “Don’t forget that you have a lot of things to do next. Now listen to me, hold your grandma’s funeral as soon as possible, so that she can depart this world in peace, and you can set out to do what you should do.”
Xu Youning looked at Auntie Sun, absentminded—”Yeah, I’ve got work to do…”
At that moment, the staff went into the room and took her grandmother’s body out.
Xu Youning suddenly realized what would happen next. That was, she would eternally lose her grandmother. From then on, she would never be able to see or touch even her grandmother’s dead body.
Xu Youning felt as if she had been punched and her head was about to explode, while her heart was aching.
“Grandma!”
Xu Youning nearly exhausted herself from that shout, which sounded like it burst from deep within her chest. However, her grandmother did not respond.
Like a beast out of control, Xu Youning rushed out and pushed the staff away. She held her grandmother’s stiff and cold body as hard as she could and said, “Grandma, I was wrong. Will you come back? Please, don’t leave me…”
She pleaded, “Grandma, don’t leave me alone.”
“Grandma…”
Auntie Sun rushed out after her, distressed and helpless. She placed her hands on Xu Youning to comfort her and said, “Your grandma would be worried if she saw you like this. Before she passed away, her greatest wish was that you could live a good life.”
“Auntie Sun,” Xu Youning wept aloud and said, “My grandma died because of me. I missed seeing her for the last time. She wouldn’t forgive me. She would never be able to forgive me…”
“Didn’t you hear what I told you?!” Auntie Sun approached Xu Youning to look directly into her eyes and said, “Your grandma said she didn’t blame you. She believed that you had your own reasons. Youning, if you want to take the blame, the best way to redeem yourself is to simply live like a normal human being—that’s what your grandma wanted. Do you understand what I’m talking about?”
“…” Xu Youning felt a distending pain in her brain, while her eyes were misty with tears. It seemed that she had gotten the point, but she looked vacant.
“Youning, just bid your grandma farewell,” Auntie Sun said in all earnestness, “You are young, and you have a long way to go in the future. People will die, and your grandma was no exception. Life is full of loneliness.”
“Auntie Sun…”
Xu Youning wept like a child who was forced to part with her parents for the first time. Her temples tingled ceaselessly, and the pain spread to her face, which left her out of breath.
She was just a kid when she lost her parents. When she heard her elders say that her parents would never come back, she simply felt sad, too sad to breathe.
Then, it turned into the deepest feelings of despair.
Her grandmother was her only family and her only reason for living. However, she had caused her grandmother’s death.
If it weren’t for the desire to avenge her grandmother, she would be unable to figure out how she would live alone in the world.
Auntie Sun slowly pulled Xu Youning’s hand off her grandmother, then she wiped away the tears on her face and said, “Youning, it’s time for you to be strong. Stop crying. It’s your last meeting with her. Your grandma would like to see you happy.”
Xu Youning closed her eyes and nodded, then she wiped her tears to see her grandmother off.
“Farewell”—she said to her grandmother in her mind. She swore to take revenge on the guy who killed her grandmother, and she wanted him to go to hell. She thought, “Grandma, you won’t be alone in the other world for too long. After I avenge you, I’ll go to you without worries.”
“Maybe I will be reunited with my family in the other world.”
“Miss Xu, you have our deepest sympathies.” After some time, the staff handed a box to Xu Youning.
Xu Youning took the box, with her hands trembling and her heart tingling.
She hugged the box to her chest tightly and said, “Grandma, let’s go home.”
After returning home, Xu Youning began to pack up her grandmother’s belongings.
She didn’t know whether she could return after she left her home that day, so she had to get everything done properly.
Xu Youning could still feel her grandmother as she was packing up the things she had used before death, which made it hard for Xu Youning to hold back her tears. Finally, she finished packing, and her eyes became bloodshot.
After gathering up her grandmother’s belongings, Xu Youning took several faked passports and her grandmother’s ashes to leave.
“Youning.” Auntie Sun showed up at the gate and asked, “Are you leaving now?”
“No, I’ll go to someplace first,” Xu Youning wiped her tears and said, “Auntie Sun, come with me to see my grandma off.”
Xu Youning and Auntie Sun went to a temple on the top of a hill with her grandmother’s ashes.
Her grandmother loved that place the most because it was peaceful. Perhaps the old lady knew that she wouldn’t live long, and some time before she told Xu Youning to send her there after she passed away.
Xu Youning positioned her grandmother’s remains and lit incense for it, then she donated enough money to the temple before leaving with Auntie Sun.
“Auntie Sun, thank you for taking care of my grandma these days,” Xu Youning placed a check in Auntie Sun’s hand and said, “That’s all I can manage.”
Auntie Sun gave a glance at the numbers on the check, then she quickly gave it back to Xu Youning and said, “You’ve already paid me for that. I can’t ask you for more money. You’ll be needing it in the future!”
“Auntie Sun, just take it,” Xu Youning forced a smile and said, “I have plenty of money. You didn’t leave when the accident happened yesterday, and you came back to tell me about it. I’m very grateful to you. I’ll feel bad if you don’t take it.”
Auntie Sun hesitated for a while, then she placed the check in her purse and said, “I won’t spend the money. Just return to see me and get it if you need it in the future.”
“Return?”
Xu Youning thought, “I’m afraid I will never return.”
“Auntie Sun, let’s go our separate ways,” Xu Youning wiped her tears and said, “Take care of yourself. Goodbye.”
With that, she walked straight toward the parking lot without looking back. Although tears blurred her eyes, she didn’t dare to stop.
“You too, Youning,” Auntie Sun sobbed and said, “Call me if possible and tell me where you are.”
Xu Youning burst into tears, but she didn’t dare to look back. She simply waved her hand and got in her car.